self management posts
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Email Noise? Create Team Norms.
September 24th, 2009
When I’m working with teams to improve communication, the issue of email generally produces stressed faces, furrowed brows, and sweaty foreheads. It’s astounding how depressing and chaotic our inboxes have become. But it doesn’t need to be that way.
When I sense stress around the issue of email communication, I ask teams “Have you ever sat down together to discuss how you will send and receive messages to one another?”. Most teams respond with a clear “No, we haven’t done that and we don’t have a clue of how to start that type of conversation.” Fortunately, it’s not a difficult conversation to start.
We just roll up our sleeves and discuss these issues:
1. Subject lines norms– Create agreements within your team regarding what goes in subject lines. For example, if the message concerns a client, start the subject with that client’s name – that simple step will help recipients identify the purpose of the message and effectively catalog it.
2. Set up mailbox rules - Set up rules and filters to organize your inbox. (See my Tuesday post for more on rules and sorting.)
3. Establish team norms around who’s taking an action, who is supporting an action who is to be informed on an action. The team should clearly identify an owner’ to respond and handle the issue.
- TO: if I ‘own’ a particular task and somebody wants to send me an email notifying me of an action that I need to take, my name will be in the TO: area. I will immediately know that I am responsible for taking action.
- CC: means that I am “supporting” someone else’s action and,
- BCC: means that all I need to be is keep myself “informed”.
4. More Rules Emails that have my name is in the TO: area – those emails can be sorted as action emails. Really really helpful!!
5. Discuss the use of high priority, moderate priority and low priority.
If you set aside to have these types of email norm conversations, you’ll help your team become more productive and save them from inbox stress!
How to Manage Interruptions By Being Clear on Priorities
August 25th, 2009
Managing interruptions and staying on top of daily multi-tasking each day is critical to being effective in business today. When business leaders discipline themselves to set clear priorities and communicate “norms for engagement” with co-workers productivity and results soar while overwhelm begins to decrease.
I recently had to find a new doctor. After I filled in the initial visit paper work, the receptionist handed me a document titled “Doctor’s Rules and Regulations” (norms for engagement). It clearly outlined the Dr. had only 10 minutes for each appointment. It directed me to bring one issue to the table at each doctor’s appointment. If I had two issues, I needed to make sure that I presented both within the 10 minute parameter.
The document then illustrated a time calculation: if each patient was one minute late multiplied by 45 patients per day equals the last patient waits an additional 45 minutes. He had clearly identified his priorities and this was his effort to communicate them to me.
Although my experience with the doctor was a little harsh, I recognized that he was clearly outlining his norms of engagement in my best interest. Think about it — one day I might be that last patient myself.
If you want to be more effective and manage your interruptions with increased ease, it is really important to sit down at the beginning of the day to consider your priorities. Whether it takes 5 minutes or 20 minutes – it is probably the most important time in your day
- to get clear on what you need to do,
- to be responsible for performance and results, and
- to clearly articulate your own norms of engagement to the people with whom you work.
That’s exactly what the doctor had done. He had clearly outlined his expectations of how I would prepare for the meeting, his expectations of how I would bring issues to the table. With this he clearly articulated our ‘norms of engagement’.
Take some time to identify what your priorities are for the day and to communicate them. Articulate your priorities clearly to others to establish “norms for engagement”.
Emotional Intelligence and Our “Private Self”
August 14th, 2009
This weekend I went to see Julie & Julia. Loved it! It got me thinking about “The Feedback Self Disclosure Matrix,” a tool that can help all of us – particularly CEOs and senior managers – create deeper connections and better results in our businesses and with our teams.
This matrix is based on the foundations of the Johari Window model that was developed by American psychologists Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham in the 1950s. The Matrix is comprised of four quadrants.
Each quadrant represents a part of our self, representing particular behaviours, feelings, motivations that are known by (self) and about the person (other).
At the bottom of the illustration you see how the four different quadrants of the ‘self’ can be altered in size reflecting the relevant proportions of each type of ‘knowledge’ of/about a particular person.
The four quadrants of our “Self” are Private, Public, Blind and Unknown.
The horizontal axis shows how much a person asks for & receives feedback.
The vertical axis measure the amount the person self-discloses & gives feedback.
This dynamic feedback model illustrates:
- People with high emotional intelligence (large ‘public self’ – orange box) ask for feedback, give feedback and self disclose often. They have well-developed public personas.
- Those who are protected (large ‘private self’ – green box) keep ‘what they know about themselves’ private. These individuals rarely choose to self-disclose. Their Private Selves are large, making it difficult for colleagues to comfortably collaborate and communicate with them. These individuals often control the flow of conversation by asking many questions. They rarely share their own experience. So, they don’t get much feedback so their Emotional Intelligence is suspect.
- Aggressive (large ‘blind self’ – yellow box) give plenty of feedback but don’t ask for it a lot – their Blind Selves dominate. They aren’t as aware of themselves or environment. This hampers their ability to work collaboratively or take in feedback from others. They have a low level of Emotional Intelligence.
- The Well of Potential (large ‘unknown self’ – brown box) these folks neither ask for feedback, nor give much feedback – if they started to open up, they would experience a great deal of professional and personal growth because they would be developing their Emotional Intelligence.
After seeing Julie & Julia, my girlfriend left the theater inspired to do more cooking – I left with the realization that this blog is a perfect vehicle for me to self-disclose. I can decrease my ‘private self’ while increasing my ‘public self’. As I write this I realize that will take additional courage on my part – yikes. I’ll get feedback!
I’m rarely at a loss for words. I think nothing of standing in front of 500 people to lead a professional development seminar. But spilling my guts in front of a video camera to post a new blog is scary. I get the shakes even writing this!
Back to the movie …
Julie trembled in her boots as she blogged about her frustrations, joys and commitment to learn how to cook the Julia Child way. She opened her Private Self to make her experience more public. I connected with her more deeply because of it.
Executives with high emotional intelligence are better able to lead and motivate their people.
Sharing their Private Selves is an important behavior. I realized that just standing up in front of a room and blogging are public activities, but it doesn’t automatically mean I’m revealing or connecting.
There is learning here for me, as there is for the CEO’s, sr. managers and executives that I work with.
Lets drop the hesitation. Pick-up a bit of courage. Boost our Emotional Intelligence. So, we’ll no longer miss an opportunity to gain more feedback and build deeper connections.
I’m committed to doing so – thanx Julie!
With time, courage, and your feedback, I’ll explore my Unknown Self, become more comfortable with my new Public Self, and get better results through improved Emotional Intelligence.
Are you comfortable sharing your Private Self in your business life? Think it might be important to develop your Emotional Intelligence? What do you think?
Download Feedback-Self Disclosure Matrix
Emotional Intelligence Series #8: How to Improve Boardroom and Meeting Apathy with Connection and Engagement
July 23rd, 2009
Total Video Viewing Time: 2:30.
In this video, I discuss the source of Boardroom Apathy.
It is human nature to disengage, pull away or conform if we sense that our co-worker or manager is resistent to a two-way dialogue, not interested in our opinion or viewpoint. Our tendency is to resign, give up, disengage … essentially lose our connection with the other and even ourselves.
In order to re-connect with ourselves and to re-engage with co-workers and managers, we need to focus on our self awareness, self management and leadership assertiveness — the sources for heightened emotional intelligence.
Be self-responsible with your own connection and engagement:
- Self awareness: Be aware of your own feelings of apathy, disengagement, lack of energy.
- Self management: Pull yourself out of your apathy by making a statement such as ‘I need to share my viewpoint on this…’.
- Leadership assertiveness: Make a clear request to be heard!
Click Here for a FREE download of the Connection and Engagement Model
Click Here for a FREE (3 minute) tour of the Connection & Engagement Model
Emotional Intelligence Series #6 – Life is an Energy Management Game
June 19th, 2009
CrisMarie Campbell and Susan Clarke of Reneevations discuss self awareness and choices that each of us can make to heighten our emotional intelligence. How you manage your energy really impacts how successful and fulfilled you are in your professional and personal life.
Choices to manage/move your energy:
- Make More of the Situation = be creative in the face of adversity – create a solution that serves you better,
- Make Less of the Situation = direct your energy toward a more positive outcome in lieu of being ‘stuck’,
- Make Nothing of the Situation = CrisMarie discusses how she made less of and then nothing of her 1988 Olympic experience.
Life is an energy game – make your best choice today!
Emotional Intelligence Series #4 – Personal Energy Management
April 29th, 2009
Be smart – rejuvenate yourself!
In this quick video, I talk about how many of us are overburdened with multi-tasking, which saps productivity. It is important to take a full break when you have the opportunity to go on vacation.
Emotional Intelligence Series #3 – It’s Later than you Think
April 29th, 2009
Emotional Intelligence – What the heck is it??
April 21st, 2009
Emotional Intelligence is smart!
It is key to the success of highly developed and functioning teams. When individuals are aware of the five elements of emotional intelligence they have a deeper ability to navigate individual and team effectiveness.
There has been lots of buzz about Emotional Intelligence for years, as well as lots of confusion about what it is.
In this video, I discuss the five core elements of Emotional Intelligence that we use when working with teams:
- Self awareness: the ability to connect with my emotions and articulate the source,
- Self management: the ability to manage what I do in the midst of that awareness,
- Empathy: once I experience self awareness I can increase my empathy for others,
- Social skills: I can navigate my relationships using my self awareness, management and empathy,
- Leadership assertiveness: not to be confused with ‘leadership aggressiveness’. With assertiveness I can competently come forward with my viewpoint and opinion to influence others and to promote effective decision making.
Consider the impact that elevated emotional intelligence may have within your core team. Willing to share a comment?
